Prayer: Finding Peace

The mood in the pastor’s office did not match the bright summer sunshine outside. Carla wiped at ready tears. Tom’s posture spoke of sadness and defeat. They had just spent an hour sharing the heartbreak of recent weeks as their nineteen-year-old son had suddenly moved out to live with “the love of his life,” a twenty-one-year-old man whom he had met at college. For Carla and Tom, finding peace seemed out of reach.

The pastor knew that Carla and Tom were struggling with a tsunami of emotions. He also knew that they naturally wanted to be able to “do something” to fix it all. Wisely, he steered them toward the most important thing they would ever do for their son:

“Tell me how you are praying about all this.”

How Does God View Prayer?

God values prayer much more than I do. He could simply and quickly “fix” things, but he enlists my prayers. Prayer is always my number one assignment when I or others struggle.

I say, “Well, I guess all we can do is pray!”—as if it’s a last resort. In contrast, the Lord says that, through Christ, we may “with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (Heb. 4:16). That sounds like a privilege, not a last resort! Before God’s throne? Mercy and grace?!

My goals can be very utilitarian, very solution-oriented. Yet Jesus says, “Come to me” (Matt. 11:28).That call is connection-oriented; person-oriented. Prayer should deepen my relationship with my Father.

I regularly mis-value prayer. I put it off and minimize it, while Jesus often prayed all night, alone. Parents like Carla and Tom may spend many nights feeling alone. Perhaps that very loneliness and heartbreak are opportunities to learn prayer, to talk with the one who says, “Be still and know that I am God” (Ps. 46:10).

What Does Prayer Teach Me?

Prayer is an automatic admission that I need help—and it must come from outside myself! In prayer, I’m admitting that neither my degree of wisdom nor of strength is equal to the job. Prayer begins to teach the all-important lesson of my weakness and dependence. Prayer reminds me that, in God’s strength, “when I am weak, then I am strong,” and that “his strength is made perfect in my weakness” (2 Cor. 12:9, 10).

Prayer reminds me of God’s omnipotence; it reminds me of his constant presence and peace. Yes, the Lord is always present with me, but in prayer, I am focused on him. Prayer gives me a setting in which to think more intently on Scripture—to ask my Father to guide and instruct me. Prayer helps me meditate on his faithfulness. Psalm 25 is a prayer that speaks of this desire for God’s guidance and the opportunity to know him and his ways better:

Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long. (Ps. 25:4, 5)

Prayer reminds me that the Lord is in charge, not I. Prayer reminds me that I probably won’t understand his ways (Rom. 11:33), I may struggle with his answers, and I will almost certainly want a different timetable. In other words, prayer will be an excellent context in which to “humble [myself] under the mighty hand of God” (1 Pet. 5:6).

How Does Prayer Bring Me Peace, Comfort, and Strength?

In a crisis, even unbelievers quickly pray. Why is that? Even they seem to know God is their only hope. When, as a believer, my world seems to be collapsing—slowly or suddenly—prayer should be my first, fast, and reflexive action. Whether it’s during the immediate impact, as my personal “earth” is still quaking, or in the ongoing daily slog of sadness and waiting, Peter’s simple prayer is a good one: “Lord, save me!” (Matt. 14:30). And the Lord will be just as ready to catch my heart as he was to reach out to Peter!

I will not always see or know what the Lord is doing in answer to my prayers. Perhaps that knowledge will be long into the future, or perhaps it will never come on earth. The early church, praying for Peter to be released from prison, did not know that the angel was already awakening him, unshackling him, and leading him out until they saw him later (Acts 12:1–17). Praying “in the dark,” without details, is difficult. But it is a necessary lesson.

How Can I Become a Better Pray-er?

First, remember that these habits are things that believers learn to do. Many of these concepts are mind-sets that are counterintuitive to my fallen nature. Therefore, they are legitimate prayers for myself; they are requests that I should often repeat.

Second, give some thought (and some practice) to the Apostle Paul’s “recipe for prayer” in Philippians 4:5b–7:

The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Steps:

1. Remember whom you are talking to. The Lord is present.
2. Don’t waste time worrying. Again, remember who you’re addressing.
3. Mention any and all requests before God. He already knows them, but you need to hear, examine, and own them.
4. Express thanks to God. For what? For his presence with you. For what he has done, is doing, and will do in his perfect will. That is thankful trust—even in the dark.
5. Stop there, without inserting directions or a timetable of your own! (After steps one through four, I can count on his peace to protect my heart and mind—that is, my feelings and thoughts.)

Why can you have peace? You can have peace because of the trustworthy God you are addressing!

There’s probably a lot more to come in Carla and Tom’s situation. At times, finding peace will seem to elude them. Their hearts and minds will need guarding, guiding, and strengthening. The Lord Jesus, through his death and resurrection, has made it possible for them, for me, and for you to confidently “draw near to the throne of grace that [we] may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need” (Heb. 4:16).