If you’ve been looking at pornography for any length of time, you have a toxic waste dump in your mind that takes time and intentionality to clean up! How do you begin to decontaminate your mind? The next few video and written blogs I’ll be doing will consider the important steps you need to take to renew your mind.
To get started, let’s use Romans 12:2 as our orienting theme verse: “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” (ESV). The hard truth is that ongoing pornography use profoundly damages your views of life, sex, others, and God. Change is much bigger than merely stopping bad behaviors; it means the renewal of your mind—transforming your worldview—so that your thought patterns are conformed to the truths of Scripture.
The first step of renewing your mind from pornography is taking your thoughts “captive.” 2 Corinthians 10:5 says, “We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.” Pornography is a prime example of an argument against God and his rule over the world, particularly over your own life. Pornography entices us to denigrate our fellow image-bearers into consumable objects, and it promotes a view of sexuality that is completely against God’s design for what it means to be a person. It diminishes us to brute beasts ruled by our passions (see Jude 10).
So, knowing what porn does to our minds and hearts, renewing our minds becomes a place of warfare. It’s time to engage the fight and start taking prisoners!
All this is to say, taking your thoughts captive is about intentionally engaging God in the places of your struggle. God wants you to draw near to him in your sexual struggles.
What does it mean to take every thought captive to obey Christ? In the past, I’ve viewed that as a hand-slapping rebuke: “Bad Dave! Don’t think that thought! You need to start thinking holy thoughts right now…” If that’s how you’ve viewed it, you know that approach hasn’t been particularly helpful. Others have commented that they need to take their mind off of lustful thoughts, perhaps by quoting Bible memory verses. I’m not knocking Bible memory—far from it!—but I’m concerned that too many Christians think the Bible works like Harry Potter, casting a “spiritual spell” that will inoculate you against lust. Both of these approaches miss the intent of 2 Corinthians 10 and may actually work to keep you in chains. Punishment and quick-fix techniques end up as dead ends; they rarely produce the fruit of ongoing repentance.
Think about how unhelpful the “Bad Dave” approach actually is. According to Romans 8:31-34, who is the one who brings accusations against us? The enemy! When we respond to our temptations and failures with accusatory thoughts, berating ourselves with thoughts of failure, worthlessness, etc., we’re ironically playing right into his hands. He wants us isolated, feeling guilt and condemnation. Further, when we recite Scripture as a talisman, apart from intentionally connecting with God, we remain isolated.
In contrast, God’s goal is to unite all things in Christ, things in heaven and on earth (see Ephesians 1 and Colossians 1). He is all about relationship, inviting us to live out of our union with him. The enemy wants us to feel isolated and alone; God wants us to rest in the hope that we’re reconciled to him. And, therefore, able to approach the throne of grace with confidence to receive mercy and find grace to help in our time of need! All this is to say, taking your thoughts captive is about intentionally engaging God in the places of your struggle. God wants you to draw near to him in your sexual struggles.
You see, the image in the verse is of taking a prisoner captive in a battle, bringing him in chains into the throne room to consider him before the King. Bring all of your thoughts before your Redeemer to ask him his opinion. Think about it this way: the goal is to not allow these thoughts to be “alone” space in your head. Part of renewing your mind is learning that you’ve never had an “alone” thought! You need to increasingly and self-consciously share your thoughts with your loving heavenly Father and your elder brother who reigns as King over the universe. And this is exactly what the enemy does NOT want you to do!
So, if you want your mind renewed, the first step is to be aware that you need to engage God with your temptations. When the thoughts come, bring them into the throne room. Don’t run from him. Don’t shrink away in guilt. Don’t use Scripture in isolation as a spiritual spell. Acknowledge the temptation. Talk to Christ about how you struggle with intrusive thoughts. Know that he is a present help to you in that trouble. Ask Jesus for his thoughts. Ask him to help you understand the context for the temptation in which you find yourself.
To see Dave talking about this issue, click here on Dave’s video blog, Pornified Mind: Reclaiming Your Thought Life – Part 1. These short videos can be used as discussion starters in small group settings, mentoring relationships, men’s and women’s groups, etc.
Ever since I was a kid, eons ago, I have been a long-time reader of the National Geographic magazine. So I was both intrigued and concerned when the January 2017 issue, “Gender Revolution,” arrived. How would the story on gender and transgender be told: with an objective analysis or a subjective slant? The front picture gave more than a hint: on the cover was an elementary-aged transgender girl, with the caption reading, “The best thing about being a girl is, now I don’t have to pretend to be a boy,”
I got my answer. I found myself looking at that picture and feeling much sadness. I couldn’t help but think that this young child is still “pretending,” but is now being encouraged to exchange reality for fantasy.
I don’t want to criticize National Geographic for producing this issue. After all, gender and transgender issues are in the forefront of our news and culture. National Geographic writes about all sorts of people and culture groups, and this is a story that fits in their purview. Christians should not ignore these stories of children and adults who feel out of sorts with their own gendered bodies. There is something to be learned in all this.
But the information presented in the magazine, from the main article to the sympathetic photos and stories of transgendered youth, seems designed to leave the reader with the conclusion that almost every news story today proclaims: that biology has no essential connection to what gender is, and we can be whatever we want to be regardless of the anatomy with which we are born.
That’s a deeply mistaken notion. But what’s most tragic is seeing where this has led—that we let even the youngest children make life-altering decisions that will lead them to steadily transform and even mutilate their bodies, with parents and other adults encouraging them onward. Our hearts should feel for how these children struggle with their sense of self, but we should grieve even more for the kind of help they are being offered.
The National Geographic main article, “Rethinking Gender” by Robin Marantz Henig, is the one to read carefully. It is well-written and presents itself in a measured tone, and that is what makes it all the more uncomfortable, if not disturbing. Unless you carefully read what it is saying and what is subtlety not being said, you might walk away thinking, yes, science is indeed showing us that what we believed about the connection between gender and biology—the normative gender binary—has been all wrong.
But that is not what the article proves at all. And you’ve got to read it carefully to know that.
Here is just one example:
The first part of the article describes the complexities of being born intersex. There isn’t anything new written here, but the brief summary is excellent in describing how very complicated this is for the child, their family, and their social unit. These are difficult situations for parents, doctors, and the children involved to sort through, and we should give wide leeway to acknowledge the tough decisions that have to be made here.
Intersex conditions have long been seen by the medical establishment as disorders of sex development. In other words, something has gone wrong in the fetal development of the child. A Christian worldview sees intersex conditions in the same light, placing it within the biblical story of the Fall, where the introduction of sin brought about brokenness in all things, including our bodies.
But in a post-Christian culture, energized by an increasingly aggressive LGBT agenda, intersex conditions are now being seen as evidence of multiple genders, as normative as the binary view of gender once was.
Henig then makes a leap from intersex to transgender, slipping in a paragraph that mentions Caitlyn Jenner becoming a trans woman. Here’s the paragraph:
As transgender issues become the fare of the daily news—Caitlyn Jenner’s announcement that she is a trans woman, legislators across the United States arguing about who gets to use which bathroom—scientists are making their own strides, applying a variety of perspectives to investigate what being transgender is all about.
Step back and notice what has happened here. Henig has linked here the complex issues about intersex conditions to someone being transgender. The reality is, these are two very different things. Jenner’s transformation has nothing to do with being born intersex. The phenomenon of transgenderism is quite distinct from intersex complications. This unwarranted (and virtually unnoticeable connection), if not challenged, will leave the casual reader thinking the two are related, and that science is finally coming to understand, through its research, a new understanding of gender.
As we at Harvest USA said in our recent magazine, Transgenderism: The Reshaping of Reality, we do not see this issue as discovering new things about gender. This isn’t enlightened thinking at all, but rather it is “nothing short of an assault against God, and God’s authority to create people in his image, ‘male and female.’” Transgenderism is a radical redefinition of what it means to be human, and the implications are likely to bring tragic results.
How did we go from ongoing generational discussions about gender expression (or roles) to encouraging children to alter and even mutilate their bodies to fit into those roles?
Henig casually drops hints that, indeed, something more than science is driving this phenomenon. At the beginning of the article, she writes about a 14-year old girl questioning her gendered body: “She’s questioning her gender identity, rather than just accepting her hobbies and wardrobe choices as those of a tomboy, because we’re talking so much about transgender issues these days” (emphasis added). Did you catch what is being said here? So much of what children are struggling with is how to fit into cultural roles of gender, many of which change from one generation to another. How did we go from an ongoing generational discussion about gender expression (or roles) to encouraging children to alter and even mutilate their bodies to fit into those roles?
What is driving the issue of transgenderism and its acceptance is not scientific research (note: let’s not as Christians oppose legitimate scientific inquiry into this issue), but a dominant culture which has persistently deconstructed and disassembled gender and gender roles for more than half a century. In a materialistic worldview that refuses to see, much less accept, a divine plan for how we should live, we now arrive at truth by means of our own individual stories and experience. This personal-truth-for-me culture is seen in a photo of a six-year-old boy who describes himself as “gender creative” and who, the caption says about him, “is very sure of who he is.”
A six-year-old who knows with certainty who he is? Childhood has always been observed as the journey in which young boys and girls wrestle with who they are, and eventually emerge into adulthood with a clearer understanding of themselves and the world in which they will live. Now we think children are wise enough to short-circuit that process by more than a decade.
The real difficulties these children experience will not be fixed by encouraging them to pretend to be what they are not, and especially to put their bodies at the mercy of hormone-altering drugs and surgical knives. Walt Heyer, a former transsexual, says in his recent commentary of National Geographic’s issue on gender, “Like others who elect to live the transgender life, I painfully discovered it was only a temporary fix to deeper pain… if National Geographic truly wanted to explore the complexities of gender change, they would have included stories of people who discovered that living the transgender life was an empty promise.”
Of course they didn’t, Walt. It’s not the cultural stream the world is swimming in right now. It’s all further evidence that the world we now live in is a modern version of ancient Israel: no truth, no design, no shared meaning or purpose. We’re left with conflicting opinions on how to live that give us no clear path forward. “In those days there was no king in Israel. Everyone did what was right in his own eyes (Judges 21:25).